


A New Beginning

by iwillnotbecaged



Series: Flying high without ever leaving the ground [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: I just really love him ok?, Multi, Polyamory, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Sam Wilson is a Gift, Sam-Centric, vague mentions of ptsd
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-05
Updated: 2016-01-05
Packaged: 2018-05-11 21:38:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5642872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iwillnotbecaged/pseuds/iwillnotbecaged
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam wakes up on New Year's Day</p>
            </blockquote>





	A New Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> So, I have no idea what I'm doing. I haven't written fiction ever in my life, but I saw a post on tumblr with 52 prompts for 52 weeks and this popped into my head (in the middle of church - I didn't pay much attention to that sermon). The prompt for this week was a story entitled "A New Beginning." There may eventually be more, maybe as chapters or maybe as a series, I don't really know. I make zero guarantees.
> 
> Please let me know if there's something else I should tag or if you catch a typo or anything at all. Help a newbie out :)
> 
> Major thanks to the extravaganza squad for convincing me that this has potential and indulging me in my love of all things Sam Wilson.

Sam wakes up slowly on New Year’s Day. He can feel the sun sneaking through the blinds, slowly traveling across his skin. It adds to the comfortable warmth of the two supersoldiers sharing his bed and makes him even more reluctant to open his eyes.

He just doesn’t want to do that yet. Opening his eyes will mean acknowledging that it is a new morning, a new day, a new year, with all the attendant obligations. Problems that need his perspective and people who need his support.

It’s funny to him, sometimes, that he finds himself in the role of the adult in this makeshift family he stumbled into. It’s hilarious, actually, that a man who strapped a set of wings to his back and leapt into combat for a country that can’t even seem to decide if his life matters is seen as the voice of reason in _any_ group. And yet, here he is.

As Sam prepares to open his eyes and face the day, he wishes for just a moment that his new friends (and particularly his boyfriends) would realize the truth - he’s making it up as he goes just like everybody else. He doesn’t magically have answers and he’s not exactly a naturally patient and understanding man.

Any answers he has are just a factor of being a little bit farther down the road of recovery than Steve and Bucky. He made plenty of his own mistakes when he first got back and all he’s trying to do is help steer these idiot white boys around the same pot holes in the road.

The zen master role they’ve given him is a whole other thing, though. Sometimes he thinks Steve and Bucky take it for granted. That they keep piling things on without realizing that his patience and understanding is a choice he makes every day. That these quiet moments of the morning before he opens his eyes are when he actively chooses the person he wants to be.

He hopes that when he fucks up and loses his shit one day (and he knows he will), either Steve or Bucky will step up to the plate and take a turn being the steadfast one, the shoulder to cry on. Hell, maybe they both will. He trusts them; he believes they’ll be there for him when he needs them. But he won’t really know until it happens will he? This is still new and if he’s being honest with himself, there are times when he’s still not entirely sure how he ended up as the third point of a triangle in the great saga that is the love story of Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes.

He feels Steve shift behind him and puts those doubts away for another time. Today he chooses a new beginning; today he chooses kindness and forbearance; today he chooses to be who the men he loves need him to be. He fought long and hard to get to the place where that choice was possible to make and he won’t give it up easily.

With the decision made, Sam opens his eyes to another day in this life he’s building.


End file.
